I’m slurping like I just woke up from a coma, dressed like an anime side character who got cut in episode one. Someone save me before these noodles do!
- Uggo 11

My hairline dipped, my teeth got trust issues, and my existence needs a factory reset
- Uggo 420

Yo, I’m HOMY with WiFi issues. My hair screams ‘rock legend,’ but my bank account whispers ‘try again.’ These glasses? Just so I can watch my life go downhill in 4K
- Uggo 69

I look like a crime scene sketch that came to life, my teeth playing Tetris, and this popcorn the only thing sticking around for my mess
- Uggo 999